My 2-year-old is getting money savvy. Maybe it’s testament to where things are in the world with this economy as people get focused on money–either getting it or keeping it–but my toddler is no longer immune to the love of money. As I was dropping him off at the sitters he told me from the back seat “Give me money mom.” I laughed, then he kind of growled, “I want money mom.” It’s not the first time he’s expressed interest in money. He often will find a buck or a quarter around the house and flash it around singing “Me got money.” That happy dance lasts just long enough for the owner of said money to jump up and snatch it back from his hand. Though he likes the idea of money, he doesn’t really understand money. He simply knows it’s valuable, that people want it, so therefore he should too.
Most people think like a toddler when it comes to money; Give Me Some!
It’s not money my kid wants. It’s really the feeling of importance he gets from having it because he knows everyone else wants it. He has a feeling of independence knowing he has something that the grownups have. For my older boys it’s all about the “stuff” they can get from it. The taste of ice cream, the fun of playing with a new toy or a feeling of being in control and knowing they can buy what they want.
However, none of that is clear to them. They just think they want money. Give me stacks and stacks of it. Likewise adults think that way too. We want a loaded bank account. We want wads of cash in our hands. We dream of spreading hundred dollar bills on our bed and rolling around in them. (That is not just my fantasy). All those thoughts are wrong. Not wrong in the sense that they are immoral or greedy or something to feel ashamed of, they are wrong because it’s not really what you want.
Money is a dirty thing that likely traveled in the bum of a smuggler at some point–True story. A banker told me.
Money is just colorful bits of paper that really does nothing in and of itself. We think we want it because it can get us new boats, luxury cars, a McMansion, or whatever. But those aren’t the things you want. Here let me reach into your brain for a second. Yep, just as I thought, what you really want is the feeling those things give you.
Driving a luxury car passed some schmoe on the freeway makes you feel kick ass–that’s what you really want. You want the feeling of kick assedness. Similarly, having a bank account with lots of positive numbers in the balance gives you a feeling of security. You know your retirement is safe or that you can provide for your family.
Realize what you really want and then pursue that, not money
The realization of this is key to getting what you really want. It may get you more money–or not. Often times go after your passion you sometimes realize you are able to make money and still have that feeling you are after. Sometimes, it just ends up so that you get that feeling without needing the money. Here’s the super cool, twisty question; If you could get all those things without money would you? I mean the feelings. If you could get the same feeling of being a big shot without ever having to pay for everyone’s dinner would you? Look passed the objects that you want money for. Ask yourself, why you want that thing. Then ask more questions. Finally you will pin down a feeling you get from all those things. And that’s what you go after.
If you don’t realize that you’ll always be buckled up, sitting in your car seat saying “I want money,” and gritting your teeth.
If I can get what I want without having to make the money to get it would I? Hell yeah. I do it all the time. I take my kids on trips, I fly in planes, I race Fast and Furious style in cars, I have experiences all the time–and all for free. How I go about those things is another blog post. The point is, I’m an average gal, not ridiculously rich, I just go after the experience, because in the end that’s what you really pay for.
Shelly Cone is a journalist, public relations professional, and press release writer. She is also the owner of Beach Betty Public Relations, a California lifestyle design company offering press release services, media relations and collaborative marketing events to help you design your life by growing your business.